A SOLDIER'S PERSPECTIVE
THE WEB'S LEADING MILITARY BLOG SINCE 2004
To say that with treatment we can get better seems to suggest that we can be cured. This is not the case, we can improve our standard of living by learning coping skills, become educated about our triggers, learn to identify and express our emotions. PTSD rewires the brains neurological landscape, it is as if we have been given a new brain with the same memories and no one told us of the switch. With this new brain we have been given hijacked neuropathways telling us that our survival is in jeopardy. Without the education, social and coping skills training, values identification, relaxation techniques, counseling and therapy, this debilitating and overwhelming mental illness will defeat us every time (Cercone, 305-307).
I dealt with PTSD by self medicating for 14 years until my anger, suffering, fear and unmet needs became overwhelming. It can take years for the problems to accumulate to the point of self-destruction. My realization of this began when a man stabbed me in the face because I had offended him numerous times and when he had an opportunity he acted on it. It took someone trying to take my life to realize that I was mentally ill and that I needed help. My behavior, attitude and cognitive processes had digressed to the point of self hatred and feelings of unworthiness.
I kept thinking of killing myself for 15 years or so, driving off the road, instigating fights, fingering my gun and imaging the relief I would feel if I just pulled the trigger. I could not do it myself, so I sought out people and situations that endangered my existence. How do I kill myself without me doing it? I thank God that I persevered through it and I am well enough today that I may help someone else like me, which was Gods plan all along.
If you know of a veteran or someone you may think is suffering from PTSD, help them get help. In the military we are trained to keep going, to never give in to the enemy. The returning veteran needs our help in reintegrating into society. They need our support and assistance to transition from a life or death struggle in combat to a new beginning in society. We will never be the same as we were before we went to war. But with your help and support we can redirect the negative outcomes from PTSD and become productive to society.
DO NOT WAIT FOR YEARS TO GO BY TO SEEK HELP, IF YOU DO YOU COULD LOSE THEM OR YOURSELF TO THIS ILLNESS.
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![[UPDATE] The “Face” of Military Dating Scams – The Wall of Shame](http://militarygear.com/asp/wp-content/themes/LondonLive/thumb.php?src=http://militarygear.com/asp/wp-content/uploads/2010/07/2.jpg&w=53&h=41&zc=1&q=100)
Anatomy of a Military Dating Scam
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@ No Name dont you think you can find something better to do besides a
sue
Thank you for sharing your story with us. I’m very glad that you did not succeed in your wish. I’m so thankful that God has given you hope and a way to make your life meaningful, not only to you but to the others you help as well as all of us who may know someone in need. You will be remembered in my prayers. May God hold you and keep you and bring you comfort. Thank you for your selfless service.
Donna
Yes, Thank You for sharing your story with us. I totally agree with what Sue said. I’m glad that God didn’t allow you to take your life and I’m so glad that you got help and that you are helping others.
Thank You for your service to this great country of ours! Blessings upon you!
Leta
Reading about your 14 years of suffering, self medication and despair was difficult. It is heartbreaking to read. I, too, am thankful that you were able to break through the demons and despair and find a way out. Sadly too many Americans (even those family members of men and women who suffer from PTSD) have no education about how to assist those who need it so critically.
My uncle (Vietnam era) suffered greatly from PTSD. I remember many nights as a child when he would be visiting and wake up in the night screaming, running through the house, punching anything he could reach. It was a very scary time for me. And even more confusing when the following day he was the sweet, kind and gentle man I loved. My parents always told us he was just mentally ill and there was nothing anyone could do about it. Now I know differently – there is plenty we can do about it and I regret that he never found the peace in his life that he so deserved.
I have MUCH admiration and respect for you. Thank you for your service to our great nation and thank you for sharing your journey. I hope that many others who are suffering through PTSD like you will find answers and inspiration from you.
Marsha
I like the others, thank you for your selfless service and for sharing your story. God has a plan for all of our lives and I am so glad that you are on the road back.
I have a friend who has PTSD and he still will “not give in to the enemy” of whom I feel is myself from his standpoint. He’s great at the flight part, doesn’t trust and lives in isolation. I have delivered books on healing etc and I’m at wits end as to how to try to help him at this point. I know he feels abandoned by God and suffers from survivors guilt. I don’t want to abandon him, i want to help. Do you have any suggestions that might help me break through his walls. I’ve been trying for about a year and half now.
God bless you, you all are true heroes!!
Roman General
Thank you for your support and comments to all, it is humbling to know true compassion and empathy.
Marsha, your friend is blessed to have you. If you have you asked him to go to counseling already, suggest that you would go with him. If he is abusing drugs and alcohol suggest AA or NA and again suggest going with him. Maybe research some of the web sites and blogs and give the information to him as a way to let him that he is not alone. Look up your nearest suicide hotline telephone numbers and give them to him.
The biggest thing you can do for him is to keep being his friend and offer support. Remember, you will not be able to make him get help if he does not want it.
Marsha
Thank you for your suggestions..He has shut down for different periods of time with me and this time has been the longest…he won’t respond at all to me at this point. I believe he is in denial and feels he doesn’t need help. We have discussed counseling, he stated that he went through that process when he went through desensitization. I try to drop off reading materials etc. I do believe the only thing keeping him going are his two children. his wife divorced him two years ago. Anyway, I’m trying to be patient and understanding in order to gain that trust that he so desperately needs. I don’t believe he discusses this with anyone else. I stumbled on his PTSD after observing his behavior etc. Once he was aware that I was aware, he was able to open up to me somewhat. Then he shut down again. I think it scared him that someone does care and he doesn’t feel worthy. Not quite sure. I do know he does not feel like a hero at all.
Thank you for all of your help! I am so glad that you and others have found the road back. My heart really goes out for our military personnel that fight for our freedoms and then still suffer upon your return. May the good Lord bless you always!
Roman General
Marsha, sounds like you have a pretty good intuition and understanding of your friends condition. Opening up and talking can and will shut the person down afterward, it brings all of the feelings and emotions to the forefront.
Their is a post on my blog about the gap in understanding between the soldier and loved ones in understanding the complexities and difficulties in integration of experiences and healing.
It is called“Forgive Me”, it may help you in understanding what he is going through.
Roman General
Marsha, I would also suggest you contacting some local veterans who have PTSD that would be willing to go with you to reach out to him. Maybe they could mentor him to show him that there is another way of life, that things can and do get better.
Good luck and god bless.