I love it when Nigerian Scammers try to imitate our troops. It makes me laugh. What doesn’t make me laugh is when people fall for their shtick! Take “Sgt David Dover” for instance. According to Army Databases, there is no such animal (a birdie told me so). If no such person officially exists, who could this be?

Real Partnership Business Proposal,

My name is Sgt DAVID DOVER, I am an American soldier with Swiss background,serving in the military with the army’s 3rd infantry division based in Iraq/Baghdad. With a very desperate need for assistance, I have summed up courage to contact you. I found your contact particulars in an address journal.

I am seeking your kind assistance to move the sum of ( $ 25 Million U.S. Dollars ) Twenty Five Million United State Dollars to you, as far as I can be assured that my share will be safe in your care until I complete my service here, this is no stolen money, and there are no danger involved. Source Of Money: Some money in various currencies was discovered in barrels at a farmhouse near one of Saddam’s old palaces in Ticket-Iraq during a rescue operation, and it was agreed by staff Sgt Kenneth buff and I that some part of this money be shared among both of us before informing anybody about it since both of us saw the money first.

No Compensation can make up for the risk we have taken with our lives in this hell hole. Of which my share will be safe in your care until I complete my service here, this is no stolen money, and there are no danger involved.kindly indicate your interest in assisting me as well as Providing the following information to facilitate the smooth conclusion of the consignment fund delivery to your door step.

1) Your Full Name:
2) Your Address:
3) Your Age And Occupation:
4) Your Mobile Telephone Number:
5) Your Direct Email Address:
6) Your Fax Number:
7) The Name of the Closest Airport to your City of Residence:
Your country and your present location:

One passionate appeal I will make to you is not to discuss this misinformation to facilitate the smooth conclusion of the consignment fund delivery to your door step. One passionate appeal I will make to you is not to discuss this matter with anybody, should you have reasons to reject this offer, please and please destroy this message as any leakage of this information will be too bad for us soldier? here in Iraq. I do not know how long we will remain here, and I have been shot, wounded and survived two suicide bomb attacks by the special grace of God, this and other reasons I will mention later has prompted me to reach out for help, I honestly want this matter to be resolved immediately, please contact me as soon as possible my only way of communication email.I Also want you to tell me how much you will take from this money for the assistance you will give to me. I wait for your reply as soon as possible

God Bless You As You Help Out In This Transaction.
Sgt David Doover

Oh, there’s where I went wrong. I was looking for a Sgt David DOVER, not DOOVER. Silly me for looking for the person he originally introduced himself as. Be right back, folks.

Okay, not even ONE David Doover. But, let’s analyze the good SGT Dover’s request here for a bit. Did you notice this little slip of the tongue: “One passionate appeal I will make to you is not to discuss this misinformation…” Hehe. I’m giggling here. David Sneakers is giggling. I feel like Ahmed the Dead Terrorist. I also think that Mr. Dover has a stuttering problem. He seems to repeat himself often. His grammar is terrible, which I guess COULD be indicative of an Army Sergeant. After all, the Army Times recently reported that Officers are smarter than NCOs.

This dude is a serious combat vet. He’s been “shot, wounded and survived two suicide bomb attacks by the special grace
of God” and probably also suffered burning issues with VD and mono. The only thing missing from his letter is a prescription to Monostat 7.

I hope no one is falling for this one.