Well, it’s official. The terrorists are under a lot of stress and suffering from extreme cases of PTSD. The recent shootings of recruiters in Arkansas is a perfect example of what happens when Al Qaeda and other terrorist networks don’t provide proper counseling for their front-line jiahists.

In a recent interview in an undisclosed location, head AQ spokesman Ayman Al-Zawahiri said, “it’s imperative we take care of our brave jondi. We have been at war for decades straight and our beloved leader, Osama bin Laden (God bless him), has not ensured adequate dwell time between attacks.”

In a recent poll conducted by Al Jazeera, nearly 100% of all suicide bombing survivors are suffering from some form or severe depression or PTSD.

“It’s gotten so bad,” Zawahiri noted, “that it’s even affected their sex life.”

In fact, sales of Viagra to such jihad battlegrounds as Iran, Afghanistan, Iraq and Pakistan have increased nearly tenfold since 9/11 and continues to grow disproportionately to other third world nations. With jihadi males in short supply, AQ can’t afford to ignore this growing trend of impotence among its fighters and loyalist followers.

According to another unnamed senior official close to bin Laden, the terror organization has set up a special hotline for its warriors to use anonymously for fear of being seen as weak.

“It’s bad enough when they survive a premature explosion, but even worse when they have nowhere to turn for help in dealing with such failures,” the senior official explained. “The Americans are so far ahead of us in this arena and it’s sapping the jihadi morale to know that these troops can get help and continue to fight refreshed. We currently have no such program and our ‘Post Aborted Suicide Bomber Execution’ effort isn’t making matters better.”

In fact, without proper attention jihadists may resort to even more horrible acts like the one that took place in Arkansas. The United States should immediately help alleviate the stress of jihadists by ensuring they are killed expeditiously and without prejudice. Only a concerted effort to remove the threat will save the souls of these loyal extremists. Americans should adopt a “shoot-first, waterboard later” mentality to humanely deal with enemy PTSD cases.